| HELLO STRANGER... |
[Jan. 1st, 2006|07:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  wordupdowntown. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Broken - Nine Inch Nails | ] |
Alright, wow...it's been a long, long time since I've updated - too much to do, and too much random life happening at once...So here we are with the new year, and here I am wondering what's going on with my brain - as in, why am I up at 8am when I went to sleep sometime around 2ish?..My brain is weird that way, though...Did some mild drinking last night, but used restraint to a fine degree - drinking has just lost it's appeal to me on most levels...it helps now that most of my friends aren't drinkers or substance abusers in any shape or form, and most of them get up and out to do other stuff...Ahh life this year...at least most recently, the good first: school went well, more so than I could have hoped...there's not much more to say than that, but I'm looking forward to next semester...Ethics and such, and I don't have to take another English class since I aced comp II - YES!!..working at B. Dalton has been great, reminding me that retail (with a small crew of decent individuals) can be kind of alright, though still an occupational level that leaves much to be desired...everything from Halloween on was great!..it seems like most of my old friends are returning to Fayetteville - and they haven't forgotten me!!..Really, it makes you feel good when you meet up with people and they say that they 'missed you'...The bright spot recently has been getting to hang out with Aaron and Holi and planning art projects, but also just hanging out with two of the coolest, most honest cats in Fayetteville - I'm so glad that we're all on the same wavelength and that they don't just want to twiddle their thumbs and get 'fucked up' all the time...Aaron's first cousin Brandon, who was one of my best friends in high school (and the reason I met A. in the first place), is back around, and I foresee the two of us hanging out a lot more...It's nice, since he's also a good guy and more intelligent than the average bear...I've seen Jeremiah and Kasey a lot more lately, too...Bethany is back in town and we've been hanging out randomly the last few months - she is one funny gal, but it's good to be around someone with a no nonsense attitude as well...And now Dan is back in town, with the news that he'll be moving back this summer - about a block away!!..that is awesome...I'm toying with the idea of maybe seeing if he wants to start a band (me on bass and Brando on guitar?)...just an idea, but he's the best self taught drummer I've ever heard, putting everyone else in this wee town to shame...ah yes - there have been some girls, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that I wasn't disappointed in most of them...there have been a couple of sweeties, but most of them are 'party girls' who crave too much attention and need drugs or alchohol to persuade their fragile psyches that they have a life...People just need to grow up sometimes, and quit relying on others to entertain them or make them feel complete - that just always ends badly...Now onto the bad, which I'll keep to a minimum: Yeah, I thought things could maybe be alright with Sarah, but I learned that this wasn't the case on Halloween...Things almost felt alright, but I could not handle her being so close - knowing that she's hanging with a shady bunch, involved in much drink and probably drugs, too...And who knows when she'll freak out and call the cops on me for no reason...I did want her to come back, but only when she's got all that shit out of her system, and when she finally, fully realizes how much I cared for her, but I don't know now...I didn't just want to fuck her, or have her around when I was down...I believe she can be a good person, but how she turns out is directly related to the people she hangs around...and right now she's with a bunch of douchebags, and my image of her is one of a somewhat gross girl (when you get around like she did your image definitely takes a hit, random people I barely know think she's a bitch, but I don't know in what kind of situation she met them)...I don't know...goodness is in her, like in everyone, but that selfishness and lack or restraint takes over and she doesn't give a fuck at all...desperate people like that are funny on one hand and frustrating on the other, but since it's her it's just...sad...so many people are there to take advantage of that...I have come to the sad realization that most people are just stupid, and she's chalked up the fucking idiot points lately - if people only knew what she did, with whom...I state this in all honesty, but I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah didn't have an std, one of the ones that doesn't go away...I doubt she knows it, but one of the guys she's been around supposedly has herpes - how do you let someone that's as pissed at you know as she is at me know about that?..I feel bad, but with our recent past I have to just accept that it's out of my hands...I probably wouldn't care if I'd just met her, but she was such a sweet person for three years, a different person, and it's hard to deal with the trash she's trying awful hard to be lately...oh well...and she called for the first time in two months the other day to ask me if I had her dog, who is apparently missing again...I try my best not to judge her, but she knows the people she's around are fuck ups...DON'T LEAVE YOUR DOG WITH POTHEADS - THEY RARELY REMEMBER TO BATHE THEMSELVES, HOW CAN YOU COUNT ON THEM TO CARE FOR THE THING THAT SUPPOSEDLY MEANS SO MUCH TO YOU!!..That sucks, sucks, sucks - but I hope Mon Petit finds a better home (I'm sure someone will pick her up, she's such a good dog), one where the owners will actually treat her like a family member instead of an object...I'll miss her, and knowing that I might never, ever get to see her again really makes me sad - she would have liked to romp with Bartleby...anyways, that was pretty much all the bad, but it's in the past now...I'm hella excited that Dan's moving back, to repeat myself...music, for me, is such a rejuvenator - it get's my art and writing juices flowing quicker than anything else...damn, I have a lot more to write about, but I've gotta get back to sleep for a bit and head to work...I'll hit this more often, though...peace pipe to trip up you whacked smashing knuckle dragging slagged small paul forebrain....latuhs...Z.
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takatak777's journal
ready to rumble
so very bored.
doing swell.
getting it out.
fed up.
sleepy
dumbass random quizzes
very interesting...
